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Prometheus in Fifteen Minutes

Jun. 14th, 2012 | 05:43 pm

I just read a really wonderful parody summarization Prometheus. It was originally posted by cleolinda at Prometheus in Fifteen Minutes

Here's a snippet of the review:

"Some Waterfall, Some Planet, Somewhere

[After five minutes of Icelandic landscape porn, a large round spaceship takes off and disappears into the clouds. Remaining behind, a bald albino bodybuilder throws off a long grey cloak, drinks a cup of squirm, and immediately begins to putrefy and devolve; this is not the best day trip he's ever gone on, but he seems to have expected it. We see his DNA blacken and dissolve in closeup, swirl around in the churning waters, and reform anew, because reasons. We will never find out where this is or when it is happening, and it may not even have anything to do with the events of this movie.]





Go forth and enjoy these fine theories
They are pretty much all you're going to get"


To read Cleolinda's review, check out The Cleolinda Industries Tip Jar!!!!!

--- FH

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3 Books, 3 Reviews

Jun. 14th, 2012 | 05:27 pm


I have been downloading YA books to my kindle like a madwoman. Here's my commentary on a few of them.


CLICK FOR MOAR!!!!Collapse )


TYFYT

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The need to Break away

Dec. 16th, 2011 | 01:54 am

I NEED TO GO SOMEWHERE. SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY. I WANT TO BE IN AWE OF SOMETHING. FEEL SOMETHING. BE LOST. FIND MYSELF. FEEL INFINETELY SMALL. FEEL INSANELY HUGE.

I WANT TO FORGET THAT everyone exists. THAT I NEED ANYTHING OTHER THAN THAT MOMENT TO SURVIVE. THAT VERY MOMENT OF BEING IN AWE.

I WANT TO STAND NEXT TO A MOUNTAIN. I WANT TO. I WANT TO DO IT ALL. STAND OUT IN INFINITE SPACE.
A WIDE OPEN FIELD. NO END IN SIGHT. EVER.

TO BE NOWHERE. TO BE HERE. AND JUST FEEL.

I WANT TO FORGET MYSELF. I WANT TO TINGLE. RAW. OPEN TO THE WIND. AND FLOAT. TO JUMP INTO THE SUN. SCREAM AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS!
IF I COULD BE ANYTHING. I WOULD BE LOUD. AND INFINTE. I WOULD BE WITHOUT TIME. WITHOUT ME.

I WANT TO FLOAT IN SPACE. NEXT TO OUR GIANT EARTH. I WANT TO LOOK AT OUR PLANET AND REALLY SEE IT FOR THE FIRST TIME.

                TO BE IN AWE OF SOMETHING. I WANT TO BE IN AWE OF SOMETHING.

IF I COULD JUST FORGET MYSELF. LOSE MYSELF. FOR JUST. ONE INFINITE MOMENT. I WOULD BE SO HAPPY.
-- F  H

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Life With Roommates Is Amazing

Dec. 14th, 2011 | 04:33 pm

"LIVING WITH ROOMMATES SUCKS"

Is what I would say if these past few years spent living with roommates had not been what they are. It's true, sometimes roommates can be insufferable. They want to turn down the thermostat when it's already so cold you can see your breath and you're wearing thermals. They leave gobs of hair in the shower. They take the remote from you and change the channel when you were in the middle of watching something on tv and use the excuse that they've "had a bad day" as justification... etc, etc.

But there's also tons of other stuff that roommates are good for. Like, you don't have to clean the dishes right away because more than likely someone else will come along, she will be tired of the mess  and will wash your dishes for you (at least... that's how it works for girls, mostly.) 8 times out of 10, there's someone there to vent to when you're frustrated and need a listening ear (... the listening is optional). You get to hear more juicy gossip when you live with roommates versus living alone. AND roommates (if you get along with them) will be there for those times when you're pretending you've moved away and can't answer the door because that weird stalker-guy keeps asking if he can take you for a walk in the park... or a ride in his car. (Please Be Advised: Do NOT go anywhere with this man! He may look nice, but deep down he is evil!)

In short, roommates are great people, and they make your day that little bit more exciting. The next time you feel like beating them over the head with the remote, do yourself a favor... DON'T.

--- FH

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